England's Journal
by Fuji-Kumori
Summary: Warnings: I Don't Own Hetalia, UsUk, OOC. And bad summary. America finds an odd book while cleaning his storage room, being late for a meeting, he decided to bring it aling with him so he could read it.


**AN: **

Yes, I do support USUK~ Before, I thought that England should top but meh, now I see America topping. USUK is one of the four pairings that I support in Hetalia. The other three is Germany and Italy, Sweden and Finalnd, and finally, Switzerland and Liechtenstein. Oh yeah, and this is my first Hetalia fic.

By the way, Hetalia Axis Power episode 48~ *squeals* Awesome USUK moment. "I don't hate you. I know it must've seemed that way...The truth is, I…." Ohmehgosh! He was totally gonnah say, "The truth is, I love you." Squea! Darn you skella-death! Why'd yah hafta cover his mouth?!

* * *

**England's Journal**

A certain blonde headed, blue-eyed country had been cleaning up his storage room, which he had started a few hours ago, and nothing had barely changed. Just like before, he had gotten distracted by all the 'cool' things he had found in his storage closet.

"Cool! What's this?" He exclaimed out loud to himself, seeing an old, tore-up, leather book.

The book was a plain, Brown book, made out of leather. The edges of the cover were Gold. And there had seemed to be an old key lock on it, but…

"It doesn't work!" He said in a monotone voice, while opening it up. "So let's see what's in here~"

But before he was able to read a single word, his phone had gone off. "Huh? Oh what now?" He fished it out of his pocket and looked at the caller ID, 'England'. "It's England!"

"Yo, Britain!" He exclaimed excitedly, with a huge smile on his face.

"What are you doing, you bloody git?!" He shouted into the phone. "You're supposed to be here for the country's meeting!"

"Wha-?! Oh, shiz!" He exclaimed in shock. "It took me that long just to clean up?!"

"Cleaning up?! What?! Get your arse over here!"

"Okay, okay!" And with that, he had hung up. '_But I still want to read the book…_' He shrugged and took it anyways.

* * *

"Sorry I'm late!" He yelled, barging in through the large, wooden Brown doors, with the book, safely tucked in his coat.

America glanced across the table to see England, once again, writing in his book.

'_That reminds me!_' He took out the book and checked to the left to see France spacing out with a perverted smile on his face, and to the right, to see Canada hugging his bear, who apparently has Russia on his lap… Oh well! Now, as for the book… He opened up to see that it was a diary of some sorts. '_A diary, eh? And who's is it? Is it mine?_'

Dear Diary,

This is England, and I…

'_No way! England has a diary?! Hahahahah! How embarrassing! But…since when?_' He glanced up at England to see him, still writing in his book. '_Well, it does make sense I guess, after all, I don't know if the book is a journal, diary, or whatever! Now, to continue that book. But is it okay for me to read it? …Well of course it is! He has raised me when I was a child, so I know _plenty_ of embarrassing stuff. So what's the harm in reading about it, if I already know it?_'

Dear Diary,

This is England, and I was given this book by me mum to write out how I have been feeling. She had given this to me several years ago, I think it was three years ago, I don't know when exactly.

So recently, Finland and Sweden found this little, Blonde-Headed boy running about, he's called the 'new country', so we think he's one of the countries. Both me and France say that he's our little brother, but I think he's really _my_ brother! So, I'll be getting up _extra_ early tomorrow so I can see him! I really hope he's my little brother! I only have older brothers. They always treat me badly, and to make it worse, they all hate me! I don't even know why! So I want a little brother of my own so I can treat him better than they treated me! I just want someone to talk to, besides a bloody book.

'_England was treated badly by his brothers? I didn't know that…_' He thought to himself as he looked up at him. '_Poor guy…_' America pitied the other country, thinking that was why England was like how he was.

America had skimmed through some entries until something had caught it his eye, 'hope'.

Dear Diary,

I had fun with America today, well, I should start him Alfred now…He's recently started to talk a lot more now. And he had said that his name was 'Alfred F. Jones'. Today, me and Amer-err, _Alfred_, had drew pictures today and played outside in the yard today. I had fun with him. We chased the butterflies in the garden and I taught Alfred the different flowers there too. He said that his favorite flower was the Rose, which happens to be my favorite flower too!

It's good to know that I have Alfred with me. Being with Alfred, I guess I have seemed more happy? Is that the word? I think that's. I don't regret having Alfred has my brother at all, in fact, I love that we're brothers! I just hope that we'll be together forever!

'_H-he wanted to be with me f-forever? A-Arthur…_' He thought sadly, looking up at the British country. Yet again, he _still_ wasn't paying any attention to the meeting, he apparently was still writing in his book. '_He must've been heartbroken when I-I…when I…left him…during the R-revolutionary War…I'm sorry, I didn't know how you had felt._' He thought, with tears brimming his eyes.

He flipped a few pages until he saw a page about 'suicide'.

Dear Diary,

I'm sick and tired of how me brothers treat me! They _still_ hate me and I didn't even do anything to them. I mean, you know, I've treated them good but they still treat me badly. This world has been very cruel to me and I doubt they would even care if I disappeared. I don't even care what happens to England! I just want to end this pain already!

So to do this, I tried to kill myself. I was in my room, crouching down in my closet, when I gave myself burns allover, deep cuts and even stabbed myself a few times. And when I was about to plunge the knife into my heart, Alfred had caught me. I had completely forgot about him. He stood there at the closet door, wide-eyed when he saw the knife grazing the skin above me chest. I just froze all my actions and stared back, wide-eyed and gaping mouth. I had been selfish. I had completely forgotten about my responsibility to care of him. He had bursted out crying, begging me not to do it as he threw the knife out of my hand and jumped into my arms, causing him to get my blood all over him.

He had said that he loved me and didn't want me to leave, also, that I was his on;y important person in his life. I was touched by his words. And from there on, I promised not to commit suicide. Alfred had really saved me. Without him, I probably would have died and England would've been no more. Thank you Alfred, you have made my life worth while.

'_That's right, England tried to kill himself back then. And I hadn't even known the reason for this. It seems like his brothers treat him real badly. England…_'

He flipped to the last entry, seeing that the date was right after the war, '_Let's see how he felt about it._' But before he could, that was when France had finally started to pay attention to his surroundings.

"Hon hon hon~!" He laughed, asd he grabbed the book from America's hands and stood up in a lame attempt to keep it away from the American. "Vhat iz 'dis? A Diary, iz it not?"

"N-no, I-it isn't!" He exclaimed. '_Damnit! No! H-he can't see England's diary!_'

"Very purotective of 'dis? I 'sink it i-i-s~" He then held the book to his face, with his back facing him.

"It isn't give it back, France!" America shouted, trying to grab the book back.

"Oh~ So iz 'dis yours?"

"NO, it isn't! Now give it back, it's England's!"

Said person visibly flinched when he had heard his name being called. "What on _Earth _are you talking about?!" He yelled, a light blush forming on his face. "I never had a d-diary!" '_How the hell did they manage to get _that?!'

"I suzpect it is England's~ Let's see what's written here~" He then cleared his throat, and read:

Dear Diary,

This'll be the last entry that I will ever write, and I'm sure that it will be stained with tears all over, therefore, ineligible, but I'm not very sure. But the time I'm writing this is when…Alfred…left me. It was so painful. He left me…for his country, we split up after all those years we had spent together. I know he eventually had to leave but, he…didn't have to cause a war for his freedom. He could've just asked or told me about it! To make it worse, Alfred was the guy I…even though I'm not suppose to feel this way, he was the one I-I, I…I loved. It hurt a lot more than how my brothers treated me. I had gotten used to that and I stopped caring for them, but…Alfred, no, I have no right to call him that anymore, America, yes, America, I cared for him, and loved him, and all he does is just leave me in the end.

"What?!" All countries shouted simultaneously, as a dark blush stained both Alfred and Arthur's face.

'_He loved me? A-and I actually hurt him that badly too? _

"A-Arthur…d-do you actually feel t-this way, s-still?"

Silence…that was his answer. He refused to tell him that he still loved him after all these years, and that it pains him to see America act like that to him everyday, or even considering the fact that he had raised him when he was a child. And no matter what he did, America refused to be his friend, he even treated him badly and always fought with him.

"Arthur? Do you…"

"Shut up." He suddenly said, with a heavy blush spread across his cheeks.

"W-what?"

"I said '_shut up_'!"

"A-Arth-"

"_Don't_ say my name, you _stupid _American!" He shouted, tears overflowing his eyes as he ran out of the room.

"Arthur!"

"Oh, mon ami, you made poor L'Angleterre cry." France said in a disappointed voice, as he shook his head in disapproval.

"I-I didn't mean to. I just-"

"Enough, just go after him." France told him.

He nodded and decided to go after his 'brother'. "Arthur!" He shouted after him. He ran down the halls of the hotel, desperately searching for England. "Hey, Arthur! Where are you?!" He shouted his futile pleas.

When he was finally able to find the older country, he had heard soft cries coming from the bathroom. "Arthur?" He asked, slowly opening the door.

"G-go away, Alfred." He said softly.

"No Arthur, I came to see if you were alright." He said, searching for the stall he was in.

"Of course I'm not, you stupid git!" He cried out, from behind stall number three.

"Look, Arthur, about earlier, I-"

"Save it." He growled. "I don't want to hear it from anybody, especially _you._ That was an invasion of my privacy, and it had things in there that I didn't want anyone to see."

'_So it really wasn't okay for me to read it…_' "Arthur, I'm sorry that I read you diary. I, well, I thought…um-"

"_Well?!_" He snapped.

"I just…I'm sorry, I shouldn't have read it."

"Sorry doesn't cut it…" He mumbled.

"I'm really sorry England, I really am!" "Why'd you read?" He mumbled, as he finally looked into the taller nation's eyes.

"H-huh?"

"_Why'd you read it?!_" He snapped.

"I-I was curious…"

"But that doesn't give you the right to read it!"

"I'm sorry England, will you ever forgive me?" '_Because I wouldn't know what to do with myself if you wouldn't talk to me ever again, I'd just hurt to much, not being able to talk to you._' He continued mentally.

"…" He looked away from, with bangs blocking his face.

"E-England?" He stuttered, with both worry and fear in his voice.

"Mufgnumg…" He attempted to say, but gibberish came out.

"What?"

"I said 'Give me a hug, and I'll consider it.'"

A smile immediately brightened up America's facial expression with a light blush staining his face. He immediately talked the smaller nations and wrapped him in a warm embrace. His right arm, wrapped tightly around his waist, pulling England's waist as close to his as possible, with his left, wrapped snugly around his shoulders, pulling the English nation's head, into the crook of his and his resting on the thinner nation's head. Alfred had felt a smile form on Arthur's face, as he too, slowly wrapped his arms around the other nation.

"I forgive you, Alfred."

"R-really?" He asked, without pulling out of the hug.

"Yes really."

"W-why? Y-you were so upset just earlier!"

"Yes." He said plainly, after being in deep thought.

"W-what?" He asked, clearly confused as to what he was talking about.

"The answer to your question earlier, I still feel that way for you?"

"R-really?"

"Yes really, now stop making me repeat myself, you bloody git."

"S-sorry, I-it's just hard to believe that the person I love, loves me back!"

"What?" Arthur asked, finally pulling out of the hug.

"You heard me, I love you too."

They both smiled gently at each other as Alfred placed a hand on the back of England's head. The spectacled-nation slowly closed his eyes as he brought the other upwards towards himself.

"A-Alfred?" He softly said in confusion.

He moisturized his lips by licking them, and touched the other's lips with his own. England's eyes widened. He had always loved him, but he had never thought of ever kissing him! He just wasn't expecting it. Alfred started moving his lips against Arthur's, whilst pulling him closer into his own body. Slowly and hesitantly, Arthur started moving his inexperienced lips against the others. Arthur grabbed a fistful of the other's hair and brought his head closer to apply more pressure.

They slowly pulled apart as they open their eyes, staring into each other's eyes, still in each other's arms. England rested his head against the crook of America's neck, and he rested his on England's.

"I love you, Arthur."

"I love you too, Alfred."

* * *

**Puffy Bunny: **I depressed myself with the last two diary entries.

**England: **Then why write it all, yah blasted bunny. *mumbles: you're nothing like Flying Mint Bunny*

**America: **Aww, poor Iggy. I never you knew that you felt that way before~!

**England: ***blushes* Shut up, you twat.

**America: **By the way, Puffy, that kiss scene was horrible.

**Puffy Bunny: **I know…And advice to make the kissing scene better would be appreciated. Also advice on other things too.

**Flying Mint Bunny: **Hi Britain!

**England: **Flying Mint Bunny!

**Puffy Bunny: **Whaaat? How'd you get here?

**Flying Mint Bunny: **I came to see you!

**Puffy Bunny: **Okay…And BTW, ending bad, yes, I didn't know how to end it. I still have a lot to learn! Oh yeah, if there's mistakes, sorry, I barely check over it, I wanted to post a chapter/story already.


End file.
